By Stephen Bruyant-Langer, author of ‘The Existential Playbook – How to Survive, Live and Thrive’
Success can mean different things to different people, but happiness isn’t always part of the deal. Having spent decades working with high-achieving individuals, I’ve observed that dissatisfaction often stems not from a lack of success, but from an imbalance in how we engage with life that in turn leads to a lack of meaning.
The Three Elements of a Satisfying Life
20th-century political theorist Hannah Arendt offered deep insights into human activity, categorising it into three fundamental types: labour, work, and action. In modern terms, we can think of these elements as Mindful Movement, Creative Doing, and Impactful Thinking.
Mindful Movement focuses on our physical existence and engagement with nature. Activities like household maintenance, cooking, and gardening fall into this category. These tasks often involve repetition but they ground us in the present moment and provide an immediate sense of accomplishment. When we engage in Mindful Movement, we experience the satisfaction of immediate value and the deep connection to our physical existence.
Creative Doing involves projects where both process and outcome matter. Whether painting, woodworking, coding, or problem-solving, this type of activity allows us to engage deeply, fostering flow and satisfaction. It is not merely about productivity but about immersing ourselves in creation, enjoying the act itself as much as the result.
Impactful Thinking emphasises our connection with others and our influence on the world. It may involve mentoring, engaging in meaningful discussions, participating in community initiatives, or driving positive change. This element satisfies our need to contribute beyond ourselves, reinforcing our role in a larger social or intellectual landscape.
Recognising Imbalances
When life feels unsatisfying, it often signals an imbalance among these three elements.
Consider your current situation. Are you spending all your energy maintaining your environment without time for creativity? Are you pouring yourself into creative projects without engaging with your community? Or are you so focused on making an impact that you’ve neglected your immediate environment?
Different life stages bring different challenges to maintaining balance. You might be in your thirties, struggling to keep up with younger colleagues while maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Perhaps you’re in your fifties, questioning your identity and seeking ways to reinvent yourself. Or you might be approaching retirement, wondering how to create meaning beyond your career.
If you’re feeling frustrated, ask yourself:
- When did you last lose track of time while creating something?
- How connected do you feel to your physical environment and well-being?
- Where do you see your influence making a difference in others’ lives?
- What activities make you feel most alive and engaged?
Restoring Balance and Overcoming Obstacles
The key to addressing these imbalances lies not in achieving perfection in all areas, but in ensuring sufficient engagement in each.
For instance, if you’re lacking Mindful Movement, you might start by dedicating time to cooking or gardening. If Creative Doing is missing, you could begin a project where the process itself brings joy – whether that’s crafting, writing, or problem-solving at work. For Impactful Thinking, consider how your skills and interests could benefit others or the world at large.
Remember, balance doesn’t mean equal time or expertise in all areas. Someone might find great satisfaction spending most of their time in Creative Doing, while maintaining sufficient engagement in Mindful Movement and Impactful Thinking to feel grounded and connected. The right balance is personal and may shift over time.
Challenges like time constraints, energy levels, and social expectations can make this difficult. The key is not necessarily finding more time but incorporating these elements into daily life. A morning walk can serve as Mindful Movement, a work project can incorporate Creative Doing, and meaningful conversations can cultivate Impactful Thinking.
Creating Lasting Satisfaction
When we achieve our own unique balance among these elements, we develop what I call “relaxed readiness” – a state where we feel grounded, capable, and prepared to handle life’s challenges.
This balance creates resilience and a sense of control over our lives, not through attempting to control everything (which leads to anxiety), but through meaningful engagement in all aspects of life.
